2023 wrap up

 

A day late and a dollar short.  Sunday's matches started at 10 and although well played, did not provide the drama of the previous two days.  Jay and Sean swept Morton and Litton in a spirited match with one game at 14.  Reiko and Dodger (self proclaimed nickname but it is appropriate) swept Nate and Mark with second game at 14.  

3/4 game saw Nate and Mark roll 2 straight.   The 1/2 game had a possessed Reiko and Paul playing against Jay, whose body was just about done, and Sean McDonough.  Reiko and Paul won 2 straight to claim the 23 Calcutta and a win for the Falconer Consortium.

 Josh tabulating the brackets.  Fricking Peters won the bracket with only 3 matches incorrect all weekend.  Congrats Dave.

40, Mark Litton and Nate
4th place finishers

Nate and Mark 
3rd place finishers

Jay and Sean 
2nd place finshers

And captured below, Alex Falconer (Confused Consortium bidder) and the two winners Reiko (stay out of my way Peter) and Paul Dodger Kretz

Looking for a new Consortium

Litton and 40 played their Consortium's team of Jay and James.  It looked like the owners were going to lay down in game one as Jay and Jimmy made short work of the 60 somethings.  Game two went to the 60s and low and behold so did game three after some good rallies and fortuitous efforts.

Green and Giant were hot in their match versus Paul and Sally and rolled to a 2 game win.  

This set up Litton versus Green match up to advance to the semis.  With Litton/Morton owning Green the smart money was on a Green win.  No one has ever accused us of being smart and to the dismay of just about everyone, Mark and Morty won two straight.  As a result they advance but have no teams left in the money.  Sorry Karl, Paul, Byron, Andreas, Trumps, Chris and Trumps

So here we have the two semis for Sunday:

Lewin/McDonough (Coutts consortium) vs Litton/Morton (Fricking Peters Consortium)  10 a.m. start

Reiko/Old Kretz (Falconer consortium) vs Schroeder/Drew ( Kretz consortium) 10:40

3 vs, 4 at 11:20 and Championship at High Noon

Trumps thanking me after ruining any chances of earnings

Bottom Right Quadrant

 Fricking Peters and Dan faced Nate and Mark.  Your reporter was playing at the time and didn't see the match.  I am told it was a good one with Nate/Mark going through.  Josh and Wickers played Jay and Sean in a very difficult and close match.  

Perhaps partners next year if Trumps gets his knee fixed!

Brent!

Brent and Mike, can you believe he is 60, Philp took care of Colin and Webby to set up a match with Nate and Mark.  The games were cross court with Mark hitting to Brent, Brent hitting to Mark, Mark hitting to Brent, Brent hitting to Mark ....   Nate found a way to insert him self into the match, Mark held up and Brent swore to never do the elliptical again to warm up

Quadrant top right results

Paul Susi and Ivan showed why they should have had more respect from the bettors by knocking off Ces and Ed the Sock in two straight.  The lads then ran into Reiko and Senior and their tourney came to a sudden end.

Ivan seen doing linesman duties in a match

Reiko recovering after Buffalo tourney

A Gimp and a guy pimping

This pairing caused some problems for other teams.  Alex, pictured below retains the award winning grin from years gone by.  And the pimping guy, cause of the clothes he has available, has been working on his fitness and has some past demons to erase.

In each their two matches yesterday Alex and Scott went three games.  In match two against Jay and Sean they fought back to go to match ball and lost on a tight shot from one Mr. Lewin.  Good effort guys.  

Friday Night Lights

It was great to see the squash area filled with people and excitement last night.  Perhaps a sign of the new normal.  

The first match featured Young Kretz and the veteran Camacho versus team no respect Andreas Gill and Byron.  Pictured below is Nate shaking his head as he tries to explain the difference in doubles and singles to the young Swede.  Whatever Nate said, it seemed to work as Andreas played a nearly flawless match and Byron laid down his shots in most cases.  Team no respect advanced to play Old Kretz and some guy named Reiko on Saturday.

Match two was a highly anticipated tilt between Mike Green and the Friendly Giant against Karl and Jonas.  Mike implemented an interesting court coverage strategy and took over the match.  Jonas had said he wanted this matchup and Mike certainly rose to the challenge dominating play and bringing home the win.

Match 3 featured Fricking Peters and Consortium leader Coutts versus Darren and his last of 6 partners Ted I am on the clock Charuk. After a relatively easy first game for the Fricker, Darren and Ted put their opponents to a full test in game two.  Seen below is Peters trying unsuccessfully to win a rally by getting airborne.  

The last match of the night was a bit of an unknown.  Chris Wickers returning to the Doubles court and Josh versus Joel Clark, a relatively new member, and Dianne Naughton.

The young pair won the first game handily and then were beaten soundly in game two.  Great shooting, ball control and gets all around.  Game three was tightly contested with some very close calls on many rallies.  In the end Chris and Josh won game 3 by a 15-14 score to advance to Saturday.  All players displayed exemplary sportsmanship.  Below is a smiling shot of Joel.

Fricking Peters and Dan Coutts

 Fricking Peters and Dan Coutts.  Both generally have a smile but one is more devilish.  Dave finds himself on the left wall which is good for me as chances of him hitting me go down by 85%.  Dan has not been seen around the squash courts much lately but is a fierce competitor.  

Good luck to both.

How do you think your team will do in this year’s Calcutta?  Who do you think will win it all?

 I think Dan and I will do OK if we get a favorable draw…ie…..FAR away from Reiko and Paul who should be -10 .  If Paul serves then hides against the wall, Reiko can beat us all by himself.  I think we should apply an X-Pat Tax to his winnings tho

Dan's responses are in capitals - not sure why he is shouting at us as he is usually pretty mild mannered

OUT FIRST ROUND IN BLAZE OF GLORY

NATE/SCHROEDER OR KARL/JONAS WILL WIN IT ALL

What is one team you really want to beat in this year’s Calcutta and why?

 Andreas/Byron.  Welcome to dubs Mr Singles Guy!!

MIKE GREEN TEAM---SOMETHING TO ADD TO THE RESUME 

Who is your favourite and least favourite hockey team and why?

 Leafs because I’m a masochist.  Habs because they just plain blow dead donkeys and the French are annoying as Fuk!

THERE IS ONLY ONE TEAM---THE LEAFS---START THE PARADE ROUTE----ANYTHING BOSTON SUCKS

Where did you grow up?

 Kingston, Ontario.  Home of the Hip.  RIP Gordie!

HAMILTON MOUNTAIN---BORN AT. ST JOES HOSPITAL

Describe something that happened during Covid that left you scratching your head?

 Cedar’s dubs squash ‘pod’ rules. 9 guys for the month then the clock strikes midnight and you can be with 9 different guys the next day in your new pod.  Genius math!!

USA POLITICS

Who will you miss most from this year’s Calcutta and why?

a.      Gary Long

b.     Brent Hurtubise

c.      Mike Donnelly

d.     Norm Crook

 Never Donnelly  nobody ever misses him. Brent is now back in so he’s like a bad case of crabs. Gary will be in a better place with his ladyboys.  So it’s Norm  my first partner ever in dubs.  My skull still has the scars from the glaring 

NONE---THEY ALL LOSE-  OK NORM CROOK---WILL MISS THE TWINKLE IN HIS EYE WHEN HE HITS THE FRAMER FOR NICK OUT

Provide a name and brief description of a series you enjoyed watching on Prime or Netflix?

 The Boys is epic!  Never been so shocked with each episode.  Just when you think they’ve hit the line…wham!  Can’t wait for Season 3  

NAILED IT- BAKING COMPETITION- CHRISTMAS EDITION (What happened to Keto???)

What are you looking forward to most in 2023?

 Summer boat trip to 1000 Isles with a multi-stop return on the US side of  Lake Ontario.  All Aboard!!

PEACE AND HARMONY IN THE WORLD & WARM WINTER…AND WINNING THE CALCUTTA!

Any last thoughts?

Great to be back on the court

CALLING A LET NOW ON MORTY(Sadly you won't have that opportunity)

Paul Kelly and Sally

This is a solid pairing with Paul being a former finalist and Sally a past champion.  They got a bye in the first round and face a tough draw in their match, regardless of which team wins on Friday.

How do you think your team will do in this year’s Calcutta?  Who do you think will win it all?

Semis at least. Maybe Reiko or Ces and Ed depending on how the draw plays out.

 

What is one team you really want to beat in this year’s Calcutta and why?

Dave Peters because f*ck Dave Peters (Agreed Fricking Peters)

Who is your favourite and least favourite hockey team and why?

Leafs and Montreal. Self explanatory

Where did you grow up?

Burlington

Describe something that happened during Covid that left you scratching your head?

How many people can now make sourdough bread (I actually made beer bread a few times - highly recommended)

Who will you miss most from this year’s Calcutta and why?

a.      Gary Long

b.     Brent Hurtubise

c.      Mike Donnelly

d.     Norm Crook

Gary because of his left wall prowess. And there will definitely be a lady boy story upon his return .

Provide a name and brief description of a series you enjoyed watching on Prime or Netflix?

Dopesick

What are you looking forward to most in 2023?

The Calcutta!

How do you think your team will do in this year’s Calcutta?  Who do you think will win it all?

 We're going all the way baby!

What is one team you really want to beat in this year’s Calcutta and why?

 Mike and Brent - we'll have side bet on favours

Who is your favourite and least favourite hockey team and why?

 You mean the ice thing?  Maple Leafs maybe

Where did you grow up?

 Ormskirk, Lancashire (Medal deserved for deciphering Sally's handwriting.  Thank goodness for Google)

Describe something that happened during Covid that left you scratching your head?

 The Deniers

Who will you miss most from this year’s Calcutta and why?

a.     Mike Donnelly -I wanted to relive the 15-14 in 3 win when Mike hit tin.  (Say it ain't so Mike)

d.  

What are you looking forward to most in 2023?

 My 60th surprise party.  (Good luck Mike you are on notice)

Jonas and Karl

 

How do you think your team will do in this year’s Calcutta?  Who do you think will win it all?

I would say Karl and I have a good chance. We are in it to win it.

 

What is one team you really want to beat in this year’s Calcutta and why?

Mike Green's team. Just because I want to beat Mike. Yes, it is personal. Well Jonas you got your dream match up in the first round!

 

Who is your favourite and least favourite hockey team and why?

Favourite team the Maple Leafs, because it's the Toronto team

Don‘t have a least favourite team.

Where did you grow up?

Lucerne, Switzerland

The fair mountains of Chocolate and cheese

 

Describe something that happened during Covid that left you scratching your head?

People buying bulks of toilet paper as if they get severe diarrhea from Covid.

 

Who will you miss most from this year’s Calcutta and why?

a.      Gary Long   -  because he is very entertaining

b.     Brent Hurtubise

c.      Mike Donnelly

d.     Norm Crook

Provide a name and brief description of a series you enjoyed watching on Prime or Netflix?

Money Heist - very addictive show with lots of story twists and action. It's about a money heist and the robbers are always a step ahead of the police. (Great series)

 

What are you looking forward to most in 2023?

the Calcutta at Cedar Springs!

How do you think your team will do in this year’s Calcutta?  Who do you think will win it all?

 Ok,  Mike and the friendly Giant

What is one team you really want to beat in this year’s Calcutta and why?

 Alex and Austin

Who is your favourite and least favourite hockey team and why?

 Least favourite is Boston as they have a bunch of assholes (unedited).  Leafs fan since I was six (Wow you have seen them win a lot of Cups)

Where did you grow up?

 Woodstock (Do you mean New York State?  Groovy man)

Describe something that happened during Covid that left you scratching your head?

 Dr, Fauci

Who will you miss most from this year’s Calcutta and why?

a.      Gary Long - he instructs me (whether you want it or not)

b.   Provide a name and brief description of a series you enjoyed watching on Prime or Netflix?

 Jack Ryan Espionage

What are you looking forward to most in 2023?

 Golf (See shirt in picture above)

Mike Green and the Friendly Giant

Previous Calcutta partners Mike and Paul are reunited for 2023.  They certainly make an interesting duo.  Can Paul hold up for five matches over three days?  Can he stay out of the way and let Mike do his thing?  Can Paul contribute a few framers? Well we shall soon see.

Well this is one look you might see Mike giving the Friendly Giant this tourney,

Paul you look pretty fit in white!

How do you think your team will do in this year’s Calcutta?  Who do you think will win it all?

Mike - Winner winner chicken dinner for Paul and I.  Scott Austin wins a lot of tournaments.

Paul - "It's tough to make predictions, especially about the future.  But I like Mallon + Hilliard"  Well this is the kind of brilliance you get from a Professor.  

  

What is one team you really want to beat in this year’s Calcutta and why?

Mike - Karl - Who likes that prick?  Seriously doesn't everyone love Karl?

Paul Gotta beat Mallon and Hilliard to win it! (Well you may see them in your third match)

Who is your favourite and least favourite hockey team and why?

 Mike - Leafs, but  I am not sure why anymore.  Absolutely hate the Habs.

Paul My favorite ==> The netherlands womens field hockey team is current rated #1 internationally

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Netherlands_women%27s_national_field_hockey_team

You absolutely need to click on the link above to see why Paul  is so infatuated with this team

Least favorite ==> Fife Flyers in the Great Britain Elite Ice Hockey League have a dismal home record

https://www.eliteleague.co.uk/team/8-fife-flyers?id_season=36

Where did you grow up?

Mike - the Hammer

Paul - Victoria, B.C.

 Describe something that happened during Covid that left you scratching your head?

 Paul  

Dad and kids playing roller blading at Glen Abbey Rec Centre parking lot got hit with $800 fine for not socially distancing.

https://globalnews.ca/news/6810568/coronavirus-oakville-ontario-rollarblading-fine/

Who will you miss most from this year’s Calcutta and why?

a.      Gary Long

b.     Brent Hurtubise

c.      Mike Donnelly

d.     Norm Crook

 Mike will miss Mike Donnelly without a doubt and Paul will miss Mr. Donnelly for his inspiration.

Provide a name and brief description of a series you enjoyed watching on Prime or Netflix?

Mike - Suits.  (Harvey is the man)

Paul Bad Sport

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt15402912/

 

What are you looking forward to most in 2023?

Mike -National Doubles with Nate

Paul Upgrading my 2016 Ford Edge with something electric powered?  (Not that there is anything wrong with the Edge Morty!) (Lots of choices with the Ford brand Paul.)